i felt kind of bad the other day when laura and i were talking about our future. she really wants to have baby girls. of course, anyone who knows me knows this could never happen and so it is a shame that she met a man with such masculine sperm.
see, my junk isn't equipped for girl making. my sperm has biceps. so in theory, the only way laura's ever going to make a girl is by cheating on me or swapping.
swapping, you ask? why, yes!
my newest creation: the baby swap program......where you DON'T WANT the baby you got but still kind of want a baby. i mean, you had the shower......you painted the room.....but the baby you got is just kind of an asshole....or reminds you of someone......or is not the gender you were hoping for. whatever the case may be...
we're not talking adoption. there's already PLENTY of places to go get you an unwanted baby. we're talking a straight up swap. you post an ad on www.mikesfuckshitandkillshitbabyswap.org's website with plenty of pictures and what their major defect is (like in our case, it'd be I ALREADY HAVE 7 BOYS AND WANT A GIRL) and connect with other people who want to return their baby as well.
granted, there will be a strict no refund policy to avoid those sentimental assholes who decide later they want to know how the one that came out of them turned out. this will protect you from the bonuses and rewards of raising a good/profitable kid and having it ripped out of your clutches by "real mommy."
again, web developers and business folks alike, you know where to find me if you need to know more and want to partner up with me on this one.
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